Today the Dragon Wins

"Today the Dragon Wins" offers information from Fantasy Author and Professional Editor Sandy Lender. You'll also find dragons, wizards, sorcerers, and other fantasy elements necessary for a fabulous story, if you know where to look...

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Sandy Lender is the editor of an international trade publication and the author of the fantasy novels Choices Meant for Gods and Choices Meant for Kings, available from ArcheBooks Publishing, and the series-supporting chapbook, What Choices We Made.

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Sunday, March 23, 2008

Writer's Guide Idea for Easter Bunnies
Let's Journal About Pet Rabbits

First…I'll write a jaunty limerick at the end of this post for your entertainment (and, yes, I'll admit to writing the silly thing) if you'll make an attempt to write one in the comment field today.—Promise?

Now! Easter is a religious holiday in my life, but it's also an opportunity to immerse oneself in total cuteness of fluffy chicks and hoppy bunnies. Strolling through pet stores this time of year is sure to get me to go "oooooo" in a manner more befitting someone less than half my age and I.Q. But who cares? Bunnies are too cute to look at without the accompanying sound effects.

What kills me, though, is the number of parents who surprise Little Miss Muffet with a pet rabbit on Easter Sunday morning. What's a 10-year-old going to do with a house rabbit? Does a 16-year-old even know what to do with a pet rabbit when it neglects to use its litterbox? Does a college student have time to clean a rabbit cage every day? And let me tell you, from personal experience, yes, you want to clean the cage every day. Rabbit pee is stinky. It's stinky every day.

My bunnies were named Abby and Sniffles. And they were adorable! I got them when I was an adult, living in an apartment. Oh, no, the apartment manager had no idea. I was very careful about using wood putty to cover all the teeth marks in the baseboards before I moved out so I could get my security deposit back…

While living with Abby and Sniffles, I also learned to be careful about keeping electrical cords up off the floor. You also need extra litter boxes in obvious places when bunnies are out playing, but it's a good idea to keep a dust buster charged up for bunny "pellet" trails (because you never know what's going to surprise the crap out of a bunny just on the spur of the moment). I used to keep a stash of Frosted Mini-wheats on hand at all times, too. (Abby would sit up and beg for a Frosted Mini-wheat, and then take it in her front paws and munch it down like it was manna from Heaven.) For all the precautions I took watching those little munchkins when they were out playing, I have a dictionary with a chewed spine and a Monopoly game lid that looks like it went through a mulcher because both were under the edge of the bed one day…one day when I lost track of one of the little hoppers for too long…

I guess the point I wish to make is that pet rabbits may be adorable, but they require much patience, much attention and much rearranging of your furniture. Because they're members of the rodent family, rabbits have front teeth that don't stop growing. This means they chew on everything in sight. By providing them wood toys, you can abate some of the destruction to your home and furniture, but not all. Bunnies don't understand why they're not allowed to munch on the soft, pleasurable wood of the chair your dad made 20-plus years ago—and the matching end table. So they'll drop the silly carrot-shaped chunk of wood you bought at the pet store and go back to the chair (or table) the moment your back's turned. Sometimes, they don't have the decency to wait until your back's turned…Sniffles would look at me, drop the toy and hop over to the chair to start munching while I stooped over to pick her up.

Keep in mind that bunnies have teeth as sharp as their will.

So if you've made the mistake of purchasing a pet rabbit for a young child this Easter, well, you know, it might work out just fine. It may be a great relationship that turns out to be what the child needed to learn responsibility and affection for God's creatures. Or you may be looking for someone to adopt said rabbit in a couple of weeks.

There are organizations all over the states that help with such things. Most major metropolitan areas have house rabbit clubs or societies that, at the least, give advice, or, in some cases, take in the pets to find them new homes. A national organization called the House Rabbit Society can help put you in touch with one in your area and can provide you some good information for raising your new pet rabbit. Visit the House Rabbit Society Web site to get started in your research.

Now! Because this blog is designed for writers, and today's blog instructs you to journal about pet bunnies, let's get you some inspiration. For intense cuteness, see bunny blog videos and whatnot here:

There are also adorable pictures at the House Rabbit Society. I encourage you to visit there often (and to donate to their efforts if you can).

Have a peaceful, happy Easter. And don't forget about your silly bunny limerick! As promised, here's mine:

There once was a cute little bunny
Who wanted to learn to make honey
She went to the bees
Who fell to their knees
Laughing because it seemed funny

I know, it's dorky, but just picture the cute little bunny with the cute little laughing bees. :) I'm sure you can probably do better...

"Some days, I just want the dragon to win."
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